Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Of prepping sermons, gluing heads, and fighting birds.

I'm assuming that, having read that title, you are sufficiently interested in hearing about my weekend. See, most people just ask you how your weekend was so that they can then tell you about theirs but, I'm smarter than that. So here goes.


Preparation is great. I love it. I especially love prepping for sermons because I get intensive times of studying the Word. The last several times I've preached, I have done most of my prep work at school and things have gone fine. Now that school is out though, I do my prep at home which apparently exists in another dimension filled with Thomas the Train DVD's, apple juice, and small creatures that constantly scream when bitten by one another, throw things, and announce the success of their toilet trips to all who are in hearing distance.

After spending some time writing a general outline for my sermon on paper I decided to sit down at the computer and hammer out the specifics. It was right then that I heard the all too familiar thud of a little boy falling off Mommy and Daddy's bed. After the fall comes the few seconds of silence where they gather up the scream. That eventually came, but then came another one...from Mollie.

Cue the freak out. After falling off that bed once a week since he could walk, Ian picked this time to bust his head open. And I mean open. I didn't see skull, but there couldn't have been much more between us and it. So we headed to the hospital and got him all glued up.

CONFESSION: I'm cheap and so I got Mollie to at least attempt to braid his hair around the wound to hold it together and avoid a trip to the hospital. It didn't work and, truth be told, I felt a bit bad about it.

And now to the next morning. I got up early and really got things going. I was typing out my notes and outline and generally feeling good about life. Mollie and the boys got up and I was still able to work. Then, Mollie screams again. This time I ran wondering to myself who it was that was seriously injured this time. I found her in our foyer with the kitchen door shut looking terrified. She then informed me that a bird was in our kitchen. Here I am almost done with my sermon and now I have to go and get an animal out of my kitchen.

ANOTHER CONFESSION: I hate nature, and I'm kind of a big girl when it comes to nature invading my home. So, being the big, tough girl that I am, I armed myself for battle as you can see below:


I used Thad's grabber thingy (do those things have real names?) to subdue the beast. I wanted to kill it, but Mollie likes nature and I wanted to be sensitive...plus I didn't want guts on my floor. So I picked the bird up with the grabber and put it in a bag. I was convinced it had a broken wing because it didn't try to fly, but that didn't stop me from deciding to dump it out of our window eight stories high. Mollie again protested, noting that if it did in fact have a broken wing it would'nt be able to fly. I offered a retort by telling her that if it had a broken wing it was going to die anyway and at least this way he'd experience flight one last time.

I confess, I didn't really say that last part about flying one last time, but I should have. Anyways, I threw the bird out the window and, miracle of miracles, it started flying. And so all was well with the world.

I eventually finished my sermon which can be heard here if you really care. Ian's head is fine and as far as we know, the bird is also doing well.

2 comments:

Mom said...

Thomas, I had to laugh while I was reading this blog entry. How funny!!!
I can just see (and hear) the events of the day. I am glad Ian is ok and that the bird flew away.
Keep on posting...... I will try to read more.
I am enjoying my time with B, B, & Tobi. It is WONDERFUL being Grandma and I miss them already!!
Take care and God bless, Ruth Reynolds

Brittany said...

Again, thank you for taking time out of your sermon writing allotment to gift us all with your humor. I love reading your updates. You just gave me medicine for the soul :)

(I knew about the glued head, but I missed the story on the bird somehow?)